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the pirate girl
 
Juste un peu de silence.

black, white
and the shades of grey in between

photo's by me :)


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This is just a blog for thoughts - songs that are speaking to me, pics from where I've been today, or projects on the drawing board.
Just a random outlet.
An area of free association.
Comments welcome - though anon's are discouraged please.
Enjoy your stay & come again.
Please note: The content of this blog does not represent the views of any organisations to which I belong.
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pirate folder
the pirate girl

coeval happenings
reading: Moab is my Washpot - Stephen Fry
listening to: Napalm & Silly Putty - George Carlin
travelling/staying in: SA, NSW & Vic - depending when you catch me


Let's call today: 'Thursday 28 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
still my favourite

threadless.com



12:38 pm | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Welcome to Port Pirie

Where the locals are quite eerie.
There's no humour in your tumor.
The place is full of lead
You'll probably end up dead.


That was the tune Katie and I made up, and I must say it holds up.

We had fun in Pirie with my adopted family.
With an English background it was full on with a 6ft tree, a train that piped a christmassy tune chugging around the base of the tree, a folklore santa in the hallway, stockings on the mantle, our presents in santa sacks, gingerbread houses, christmas puddings, egg nog, homemade irish cream, lots of lollies, a scary mini tree that danced and sang and told jokes, and many a photo to be had.

We ate so much crap - it was great, and after at least 3 hours we produced a pretty impressive gingerbread house... well I found it impressive for our first try.

On christmas eve we drove around looking at the lights.
Christmas in Port Pirie is like Halloween except its prettier, you don't have to get out of the car and you don't dress up as scary things.

Kids would run up to your car shouting "Open your window!" and then pour glowsticks and lollipops and sweets into your lap! And when a house or street had put in a particularly good effort into making a display, you couldnt drive for all the people.

We stopped at one house where I got to hug Santa and sit in the original Magic Cave chair back when John Martins owned Christmas in Adelaide. Katie took a photo of a very excited me sitting in the 2000 chair. I also hugged Santa there... he was shorter and skinnier than I remembered... I guess running around giving out lollies does give you a workout. He also seemed a little darkskinned but hey it was night time so who can say?

Regardless of Santa's questionable ethnic background, I got lots of piratey delights Christmas morning - my parents were thrilled (sarcasm) to hear me return with a toy pistola that makes firing noises - and, after putting every present on my person that I could, I looked slightly goth with all the skull and crossbones all over me... in a good way - if one can be goth in a good way :P Katie gave me a Jack Skellington and Sally bag which is by far my favourite.

After promising to be good after all the junk food, we left for home on Boxing Day... okay we caved and ate the remainder of the gingerbread house once we'd gotten it home to show Dirty Ted Flint and company.

Then yesterday as an extra treat katie took me to see The Holiday in Goldclass cos I'd never been. I know, I'm lame. But anyway we got to eat pizza and watch Jude Law... mmm Jude Law... Kate Winslet has a place in my heart sometimes too... :)


12:04 pm | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
And a different New Year.

Well first and foremost the most pressing news right now is that yesterday I received a phonecall from my manager saying that the mobile division of our company is being dissolved in order to put all our focus into the permanent studios where apparently the most money is.

Making my position superfluous.

The permanent studios do things a bit differently, mostly they're always in the same place (i.e no more escapism and travel for me), and you become more of a telemarketer than a photographer.

With us Mobiles we just set up the studio somewhere, shoot, send our film/discs back and move on. Permanent Studio staff stand in malls with clipboards, make calls to leads, book people in, then do the shooting part.

Not exactly my cup of tea, but better than nothing. My manager told me that if I went to Permanent Studio I'd still have to go through the interview process etc but I'd come with high commendations... they love me. :)

This leaves me with a few options:
    a) Cut my losses and look for another job.
    b) Work in the permanent studio (Newton would be the closest, which poses its own issues), doing the same thing in the same place everyday.
    c) Work in a permanent studio whilst looking for another job.


I'm going to take C thanks Eddie, lock it in.
I've told Basil who, amongst others, brought this job to my attention, to get right on to finding me another one thankyou. Hehe. Ooh and I'm wearing the wristband she brought me from Queensland, I feel a bit like Brian Kinney meets Croc Dundee.


11:43 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Saturday 23 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
I'll be in Port Pirie with my second family over christmas so here's my Christmas Eve Eve wish of Have A Merry Elf to all!


workin' hard as usual...

Holidays til the 8th!!... then I'm on the road again for 3 weeks. '007 is going to be a year spent mostly away :( *sniff

Stay cool over this silly season folks and if you're heading away travel safe xxx


9:32 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Sunday 17 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Proof that I never go into the second page of my hotmail inbox
And proof that I haven't had an cleanup in hotmail for aaaaaaaaaaages.

Any message from anyone bearing the surname Ward, (both) Boyle(s), or (even a super old one from) Duffey, was deleted.
They're out of my life and out of my hair finally now, I guess it's well and truly time they stop taking up room in my mail.
The only reason I'd have kept them would be to open them and use them to beat myself up, and I've been strong enough not to need to do that for a while thankyou very much.
My youngest scar is 18months old. Go me. :)

Wow I have alot here with the surname Flint... some spunky boy I guess. I'll keep those with the other 150 or so.


8:27 pm | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
One of these days
I'll make some money
And buy myself those things
That I want:
Acryllic paints,
Acoustic guitar strings,
A new bicycle seat
For my ride
Over to your house each night.

And one of these days
I'll get a real job
One that actually pays
Like my dad had.

You know my father,
A bartender,
Used to wear a suit to work
Before he had a drink
The old man used to do alot of things.

One of these days
I'll give up
And give in to the man.

One of These Days
-Owen


7:47 pm | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Saturday 16 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Dear Team Leader,
You have no idea how much I bite my tongue for you.
Love and hugs you bitter woman,
-Me.


10:01 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Friday 15 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Grrrr Camera

On the phone to my tech services support testing the camera capture station which had stopped working...
I found the picture sometime later popping up as a screensaver, so I guess it worked.
Thats my 'wtf is this camera doing???' face.


10:17 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Monday 11 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
One down, eight to go.


Three days after putting my 17 yr old cat to sleep, I was returning home late one night from a night hanging with friends.

In my headlights I saw a limp form on the road, and recognising a feline frame, I swerved to avoid rolling over it - squishing a cat corpse and feeling the sensation of rising over a soft furry speedbump again not rating too highly on my list of things to experience anytime soon.

I drove a little further when I decided to turn around. If he was someone's pet, they'd appreciate being able to identify him intact, so I resolved to move him to the curb.

I pulled over on the opposite side and walked over. He was a beautiful cat. Long and orange and fluffy. Inside my head I was angry at having to deal with another dead cat so soon after losing mine, but I was determined to spare him being turned into mush; something so beautiful shouldn't be turned into a bloody fur slushie on the road.

As I approached, I told myself that the passing headlights were responsible for what I thought I saw. But when I placed a hand on his side, I discovered that I was right: He was breathing.
For a second I was back in driveway leaning over my old fossil cat, overcome by the motionless creatures pain and shock and by my own helplessness, and I swore out loud that he wasn't dead or alive, but somewhere between.

He was bleeding from his mouth and I concluded that he was probably a lost cause, internal injuries would surely mean he couldn't be saved. But I knew I couldn't leave him, useless or not, I couldn't let him slowly die in the gutter.

I awkwardly bundled him up in a towel and loaded him into my car. A lady pulled over to see if I needed help... she thought it was a child I was cradling. When she found out it was a cat she drove off. Good intentions.

He didn't really move or fight as I drove him the short way to the vet. They admitted him, and I told them to let me know what happens with him. As I drove home I thought with relief how good it was that I didn't go over him, or any other cars before me... he'd have been dead for sure when I got to him if that had happened.

I didn't hear from them for a couple weeks and I figured he didn't make it, but I was satisfied that I'd done the right thing and I thought no more on it.

Working away this last week, I had a missed call on my mobile from them and when I called they said they weren't sure who'd called or why but we concluded it must have been regarding picking up the body of my old cat, since my Mum had organised his collection and burial around the same time... yep pet burial... not my thing but anyway...

When I got home this morning Mum told me about when she went to collect him she saw in the Cat to Adopt window a beautiful fluffy ginger cat they'd called Cooper who'd been hit by a car.

We went and looked at him. 'Cooper' as he's now called turned out only to have a fractured hip or pelvis or something and bounced back from it wonderfully, and the bleeding from his mouth? He'd grazed his chin.

The nice nurse girl opened the plastic cage and I took him in my arms, not caring about the tonnes of fur that remained on my shirt, and I patted him and scratched his head and told him I'd see him later.

Then I paid the nurse and went shopping for litter, a bed from Katie's late cat, some 'Fishy Cat Treats' (which I just love to say out loud for some reason), and a christmas stocking full of kitty toys.
Today at about 1pm, Ben and I - proud parents - brought him home.

I've made peace with the universe but most of all I've made a little more peace with myself.
I lost one, but I saved another. There's a sense of balance in that that makes me feel better.

Cooper's my boy now, and I'm going to spoil him. I feel a little sad knowing that I will appreciate him more than I had 'Wickey', but in a way I see him as a chance for redemption.

The ladies man is asleep on my bed now, so I'm going to go brush pat and love him.

:)


5:26 pm | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Monday 4 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Cluck Cluck and No Surprise
An email.

Im sorry, I''m going to do this the cowardly and impersonal way and write you an email rather than tell you straight up whats going on.

Mostly because I'm leaving to work on the road for two weeks tomorrow, and also because when I talk to you I freeze up and don't know what to say or think or do anymore.

Okay, here's where I'm at right now.
There's something about you I like, something that despite the obvious differences between us and our personalities that draws me to you; without it I'd had walked away ages ago.
But whenever I'm with you I feel awkward and out of place and I feel like you're the same around me.

When you've kissed me, you've stayed on my lips for only a second and then pulled away; I feel like you don't want to do it at all. Likewise when we're together, you say you wanted to see me yet you don't really talk to me.

Messages every five minutes; I don't understand. I don't get why you ask me what I'm doing or what I'm thinking, in the middle of the day or the night, when im working or when im off. I don't get it, I guess thats why I answer with 'why' alot.

I'm a closed person on the inside, I can't divulge everything to someone I don't know very well. As you saw, I couldnt even tell you where I live. I guess Im just not as trusting as you.

And I can't hang out at a party with people I don't know.

And the party, your ex's party, just a few blocks from my house... I guess I was a bit hurt that you just wanted me there for no reason. I felt like you just wanted me there to make her jealous.

I'm a coward, I've told you this before. So I'm being a coward again and I'm taking the easy way out. I'm sorry, I told you I don't want to hurt you and if I hang around I will hurt you more. I don't feel anything that strongly for you, not enough to keep me around. Whenever I'm with you I just feel sad and weighted and overwhelmed by it all.

The things you tell me, about what you want to do with me, or how you want to be with me, really do sound nice and I think that's why I've lingered this long. But I can't keep it up, I have too much else on my mind to try and worry about how to be around you.

Also, I recognise that I'm lonely and havent been with anyone properly for a long time and my interest in you could be just to get rid of that feeling and I don't want to use you like that.
On the same hand, you keep mentioning your ex to me and I wonder sometimes if you're over her, maybe using me too.

I know it isnt fair and I know that I'm just a chicken and I'm sorry. But I can't see you anymore, it's probably best for everyone if we just leave whatever it is we're doing and go our separate ways.

I'm sorry.

I'll leave you alone now.




Sometimes I'm just a bad person.
And a chicken... see my feathers?


11:08 pm | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
I will not be your prize.

Is it odd for me to be offended at being invited to my date's ex's party?
I refuse to be the 'look who i've replaced you with' girl.
Especially when the party is full of people younger than me that I won't click with, and is a block or so away from my house.


10:03 pm | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Sunday 3 December 2006'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
"Even the things that seem still are still changing..."
-Ben Folds, Still

Sorry guys for my quietness; I have been flat out at work dealing with cunty customers and personally-challenging coworkers.
(Or is that 'personality-challenged' coworkers?)

Nothing really too new to report other than that I'll be away Tues-Sun for 2 weeks from the 5th, working in Mildura and Mt Gambier respectively.
Yay, 24hours of relatively constant contact/interaction with my workmate for 2 x 5day stretches on the road and only one car. That's gonna fun. Sheer joy.

Other than that, my only updates are:
  • our latest exchange student is proving to be our most difficult but is thankfully leaving on Wednesday - he bitches about not being included in coversation yet has moments of selective interpretation, and sometimes speaks to us outright in Japanese. Go figure.
  • it's officially December, judging from the cattle-like conditions of the malls and checkouts
  • I've gotten some airplay on Three D Radio (many many thanks to Weird Sister Rae) and have gotten some interest for gigs after playing at the Old Bush Inn Acoustic Nights for a few weeks
  • I missed out on catching up with Jason while he was back in Oz :( but maintain that he is a god for getting me the Wicked audio book for my birthday
  • Today I acquired fans in the form of a charming older German couple called Erika and Carlie whilst being the muso at the Onkaparinga Prostate Cancer Support Group luncheon this afternoon. They were lovely!
  • Basil accompanied me to the carwash lastnite and took photos of me making a mess of myself with the foaming brush (see below). Maybe my hair needed a clean too?
  • I'm going to see Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D with my Paper Lantern Ben tonight - yaaay!


  • 5:52 pm | Post A Comment... >

     
       
     
     

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