Let's call today: 'Wednesday 31 January 2007'
pirategirl 
wrote in the notebook:
'And thirdly tell us why you are an individual...'
"I am an indiviual because I'm a pirate and a rockstar and I have the coolest pants here."
Hey, it got me a second interview.
Tomorrow at 1:30, cross your limbs for me.
Ick, 3 trips into the city in 3 days? Yuck.
Today was good though, Ben and I searching for Burlesque wear for Saturday night. But he wouldn't let me buy those shoes :( Just as well, I'd probably break an ankle.
7:31 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Unless your computer hates Quicktime like mine...
See the deleted Funeral Scene of 2:37 in which Basil tells me I'm very emo (wtf?) here.
7:27 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Goddam!
I thought Alan Strang was supposed to be a kid? Well, young lad...
Daniel Radcliffe looks rather manly in his press pics of Equus.
I hope the ploy to un typecast him as Harry Potter works, he can deliver a good performance, I think he needs some other light cast on him... pardon the pun.
There's always my favourite Alan Strang right here in my town.
6:49 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Overheard
sometimes my parents swear like total bogans. Every second word is fucken.
Makes my swearing look like kindergarten at times... now I no longer wonder why I picked up such a potty mouth.
6:39 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Saturday 27 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Scary Lady Part II
Sorry, it's a long one.
to make up for my slackness I guess.
Picture this:
It's awesome Thursday.
Final performance of the production, each performance better (more awesome) than the last.
Also that night is when you're going to perform at the Old Bush Inn again.
You've set up the camera to capture this awesome show that you know will be full of energy, ad lib, and in jokes.
40mins before curtain your lead, whom you love oh so dearly because he's rather awesome, runs into a door and dislodges a front tooth.
40mins after curtain, despite the swelling mouth the lead and the rest of the awesome cast are ON FIRE, the camera for no apparent reason cuts out and you lose the second half of the show forever.
N.B no permanent damage toothwise, just a straw-diet for a few weeks.
Now, being a matinee show there was no real huge bash to celebrate closing, save for some munchies in the green room while everyone told each other how awesome I am they are.
Thusly nearly half the other awesome people came to the Old Bush Inn, in burlesque themed attire as declared by Eli I believe (spunks in corsets galore!), to see me be awesome performing.
And, to be modest, yes I was awesome.
Okay enough with the awesome usage.
There was a 4-song limit on sets, which suited me fine. I warmed up during sound check with Paul's Apartment (unfinished, hence the warm up), Jesse, Angry Song #45 Square One, brought it down some with Paper Lantern with some (sorry) 'awesome' harmonies by Ben on the melodian, then Missy Higgin's Don't Ever.
After this performance, Dirk, my awesome lead with the now slightly displaced tooth, told me 'it could be the $3.80 wine talking but you kick Missy Higgins in the vagina'... which I took to be a compliment of sorts.
Prior to me coming up on the playlist however, I was enlightening my rent-a-crowd cast and crew to last fortnight's events (see post 'Old Bush Inn' posted Jan 12th) when the subject of that story walked in. Of course, being the mature person I am.... I pointed her out so that all may see what the face of closed mindedness looked like.
Anyway, some time later after my set, somehow this woman... let's name her, I don't want to keep saying lady/woman/bigot... somehow Mavis and whom I assume to be her heterosexual male life partner were sitting on the couch opposite us - my crowd and I taking over the corner square of couches near the fireplace this fortnight due to our volume this week, the one 2 seater couch near the bar would not have sufficed for us all one iota. Plus we would have been in the way there, it being a high traffic area, and we didn't want to bother anyone.
Noticing her, we didn't give too much of a fuck, albeit for spotting a few dissapproving glances in our direction. These glances turned into outright stares when I laid on the couch, Dirk on top of me, everyone else on the top or arms of the couch, eventually Eli on top of Dirk, and me calling out underneath it all that it's my gay couch, get off!
The next time I turned in that direction, Mavis had gone. I think I saw her over by the stage and bar again when I went to the toilet at one point.
Some time later found us still at the couch closest to the stage. Me and Dirk actually seated, the other sprawled atop or behind so that the general flow of conversation was happening over the back of the seat.
We were all pumped from the show and my well-received performance. At some point some young guys - i think they were the crew's friends - sat on the opposite couch and tried to chat up some of the spunkier members of the flock, but I told them they were all mine and that's why they should become rockstars like me. Shot down, they left shortly after. One woman remained seated on the perpendicular couch openly watching us and listening to our conversation.
At first we took her to be one of Mavis' friends - her having a few people with her when I saw her - but I can honestly say I didn't take much notice of them to be able to recognise anyone other than her. But this woman wasn't really doing anything disapproving or nasty and we just commented to ourselves regarding her taking note of our admittedly explicitly gay-centered conversation.
Now let me pause here that we were just talking. And us talking just happened to include same-sex-attracted issues. It's not like we were talking about how many guys/girls respectively we pull a week... it was just a conversation between some cool open-minded folk.
Now presently Mavis returned and sat beside this other woman and began talking, reconfirming for me my assumption that they were mates. At one point I saw Mavis taking this woman's arm and rubbing it in the same way someone would try and warm one suffering from hyperthermia. By now everyone had honed in on her and the general half-hearted theory being passed around at that moment was that she herself liked other women and was just struggling to come to terms with it, illustrated by her rubbing her friends arm so much yet not wanting to touch me last fortnight once she found out I liked girls.
Dirk did mention that if she kept up staring at him he was just going to start making out with boys right there. I said to take photos for me.
Part of our conversation, which I made an effort to say clearly for all within earshot to benefit from, included me stating that I have nothing against heterosexuals. I have gay and straight friends and love each equally. I wouldn't slander heterosexuals even if I didn't like them because that's exactly what I as a same-sex-attracted person do not condone towards me. I try to keep a very 'each to his own' motto about all people, because I expect people to do the same to me even if they disagree with what I am doing. Sexual orientation or otherwise.
Now Dirk and I were kinda sat sideways to talk to everyone else, so that we weren't really facing Mavis and co. Ben had at some point, I didn't notice when, gone and sat on the other couch arm and was texting on his phone - he had told me earlier in the evening that he wanted to just flirt hardcore with her but I think he opted for his phone instead - and one of the spunky girls facing Mavis asked me 'did you see that?'
'No...?'
'She just went (flipped the bird) behind Ben's back...'
'Are you serious??'
'Yeah, she did. I'm pretty sure...'
Now you know how protective of my friends I am, and I turned to see wtf was going on and decide whether to say anything or if I'd see her do it again. On turning, I came in just in time to see her lean toward us, though eyes averted, and aim a rather loud "FUCK YOU" into our midst before leaning back again.
Gobsmacked, - damn I love that word - Dirk and I looked at each other, looked at her, then each other again. The following is a mixture of dialogue from each of us, during all of which Mavis kept staring straight ahead silently.
'Sorry?'
Nothing.
'Did you just tell us to fuck off?'
Nothing.
'Maybe I misheard, but I'm pretty sure you just told us to fuck off...'
To each other:
'Maybe our homosexual ears couldn't understand it properly...'
To Mavis and each other:
'What did we do to you?'
'We existed.'
'Oh right of course...'
Now in the middle of this I was alternating my gaze to both Mavis and her companion who kept eye contact with me... in my question of 'What did we do?' she shrugged and made motions with her hands to indicate that indeed she didn't share these opinions of Mavis, if she even knew her at all.
Retrospect on Tanya's run-in with her last time should have really reminded me that Mavis has random tendancies to approach complete strangers like she's known them all her life. So this would be the second time I mistook some stranger to be her friend if that was the case.
On this new revelation my gaze softened on her and I never really aimed anything her way after that. I concluded that she never really did anything to us, only listened to our conversation which I don't really care about; she kept her opinions to herself like normal people do and could have left anytime if she wanted but didn't.
Introspect aside, back to my recount.
The whole time we searched for an answer from Mavis she never looked us in the eye. Dirk did say 'You can't even look at us because you know you're wrong...' I remember inwardly agreeing with him.
I shrugged and turned back and said 'whatever, I'm still having a good time anyway... you guys all still having a good time?'
The response was cheers and laughs and general merriment. I resolved to let it go until I looked over at Ben and this time caught Mavis nudging the other lady and flipping the bird behind Ben's back again.
Again, the protector kicked in.
Now I don't recall this part too well because it all pretty much happened as before. Dirk and I asked her what she was doing, what we had done to her, what her problem was... during all of which she refused to acknowledge us. I mentioned about doing things behind our backs is truly cowardly and if there was something to be said, do it to our faces. I don't remember exactly what I said but I remember asking someone beside me if I was as PC as I'd earlier stated I wanted to be.
Another spunky member of our crowd asked if I wanted to go now. To which I replied yes I did, but I didn't want this woman thinking she'd scared us off. So we waited for Tex's set to end, which is kinda what I wanted to stay for anyway, he has a really good voice.
Once that was over I announced let's go - we were to be kicking on at the Blue Doors - and instructed everyone to collect their gay bags and gay phones and I still needed to get my lesbian guitar from the corner (incidently from behind Mavis).
Most of the guys and gals headed off and I said I'd catch up with them once I said goodbye to the rest of fans scattered through the pub who came to see me play.
Dirk told me afterwards that on his exit he apologised for any inconvenience we may have caused the other woman sitting by us. She was apparently very nice and said not at all and called him sweetie... yep, she's cool in my book.
Then he moved on to Mavis, telling her that first of all fleece was out (indicating her top) and that he hoped one day she would accept our lifestyle though he doubted she had what it takes.
"I hope you prove me wrong. I doubt you will. Fuck-ya-mother-goodbye"
By all reports the other lady cacked herself laughing as Dirk left.
Ben looked after my guitar while I said my goodbyes and got hugs and summarised the goings on from the corner to various parties. I received full support and huge shock from everyone, including the pub regulars I've never properly met but spoken to, and being told "it's her problem, don't let it get to you."
I agree. It is her problem, and in a way it doesn't get to me so much as it makes me sad. To see that this is still a mindset today - granted Willunga is kinda in the sticks but it's really not that country...of the whole pub full of locals she seems the only bigot to my/our sexuality, it's not exactly a secret. Even those who haven't spoken to me, if they listened to my music they'd hear I mention girls not guys alot in my relationship songs etc.
And it's not even her opinion that upsets me, as I said each to his own, you don't have to like something just respect that others do... it's her cowardly unprovoked disrespect that bothers me... regardless what her problems with me was... I'd still be just as annoyed at that same disrespect even if it was just that she didn't like the type of shoes I was wearing.
I say this to everyone and everything: You don't have to like something, but just understand that others may. It's something I try my hardest to live by nowadays.
On a completely separate note, for another perspective on the same day - Eli's blog here recounts both the production and the Old Bush Inn lastnite. She wasn't really around us much, Tex distracted her alot methinks.
11:46 am | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Wednesday 24 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Okay so the show's going well. Today we did an almost perfect show, it was just our lead confusing our curtain guy (who should have just been listening to me on the headsets and doing what I say rather than having the curtain open 2 ft off the floor) that was less than smooth.
Other than that, all went rather well. We had some childrens care groups in so made up the numbers.
Not alot to say, been busy tryin to find some proper work.
Doing a lot better in myself, just went thru a rough spot.
On a detox program now and exercising more, Basil calls me a yuppie but it's making me feel better.
Also getting round to cutting into my pile of unfinished videography editing, so I'm feeling more productive too.
3 weeks til I go to Melbourne to see Tim Finn.
Yaaaaaay!
12:38 am | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Friday 19 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Not so good
Work has completely fucked me around.
They dissolved my division; a job I adored, I can continue working for them, but in a permanent studio and as a promoter not a photographer; which is something I've always HATED doing.
So now I have to look for another job, go back to centrelink cos I'll only have a few hours (something else I hate doing), and somehow still pay my bills.
I'm also mildly stressing for this production and pre-menstrually pissed off.
Today I practically told my best friend of ten years to go away when she came over. I apologised after, but I still feel really bad about it. No excuse to take it out on her.
Using the mood to my advantage though, which I'm proud to say is a skill I've learned to make work for me, a heap more emails were deleted from my keepers folder and about 4 more job applications were put through and I worked out for about an hour.
And now I'm off to rehearsal to be hugged.
3:27 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Thursday 18 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Not as bad as I would have you believe...
Ali Baba
directed by Eli
Noarlunga College Theatre
Saturday 20th & Sunday 21st January @ 2pm
Monday 22nd - Thurs 26th January @ 11am
Tickets available at the door
$7 each ($5 groups of 10+)
I am keeping sane by repeating to myself that it will all work out in the end.
If nothing else, come for a cheap laugh.
I'll be backstage, but Eli will be playin sax out front, and Ted will accompany her on the weekdays - so hey, hanging out with us after is always a bonus.
10:41 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Wednesday 17 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
How To Make a Sideways Room
I would make it, and then throw parties in it.
Instructions from How2DoStuff.
Gold.
11:27 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Tres bien!
(huzzah!)
Finally! They're making a film with both Audrey Tautou AND Guillaume Canet!
(cute girl from 'Amelie' and spunky boy from 'The Beach'... no not Leo, I said 'spunky'!)
The other night I was watching Mon Idole ('My Idol' or 'Whatever You Say') on SBS - I was upset, I didn't know it was on... I'd have recorded it! But mmm Guillaume Canet.... least I got to perv.
Like some kind of straight girl - it's not even the accent, he's just spunky.
And so is Audrey Tatou...
AND they're going to be in the same film, 'Ensemble c'est tout'...
I think I need to lay down... far too excited.
Amendment: Just to raise my blood pressure some more - I checked on the progress of Burton's upcoming Sweeney Todd film... Alan Rickman is playing Judge Turpin... now that is a bit smexy right there too.
1:21 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Sunday 14 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
He's just such a spunky monkey...
 Nessa snapped me making out with the monkey, April's bday present from Basil last night.
The monkey wasn't the one eyeing me off and giving cute smiles from the bar tho ;)
*ahem*
I think most of our party wanted a piece of that nice girl. Damn.
7:02 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Friday 12 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Affirmations for 07
I am a good person who deserves affection and love.
I am not defined by my feelings or by how others feel or act towards me.
I am not perfect nor should I try to be.
I am not to be changed or asked to be different.
I do not have to explain myself to others.
I will not apologise for my tears.
I will not be persecuted by others or by myself.
I refuse to be trapped by own mind or feelings.
I refuse to let others influence my mood.
I refuse to accept responsibility for others' actions.
I refuse anyone who makes me feel that I am worthless.
I can hug, kiss, sleep with, or talk to, anyone I want, and face the outcome.
I can do the things, or see the people, that I love when I need them.
I will remember to take care of myself while taking care of those I love.
I will be there when my friends need me.
I will have opinions and offer them.
I am allowed to make mistakes.
I am allowed to have problems and work through them.
I am allowed to be a dreamer.
I am allowed to be happy.
12:24 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Old Bush Inn
Lastnite Eli and I played at the Bushy, not all that well, but hey Blister in The Sun went down well so it wasn't all bad. And after 2 shots of tequila once we'd done our set I obtained a better outlook of it all :P
But that's not the funny part.
It seems that everytime we go to the Bushy, we encounter a scary lady of some sort.
Last fortnight it was Mrs McPositive, getting slowly tanked and telling me that everyone was shit and asking if I really liked listening to Bonnie's aunt & co rockin out on guitar and accordian... which incidently yes yes I did.
The fortnight before I had an older lady who had confessed to using alot of substances in her day staring at me and joining in our conversations and saying 'I knew you'd been to America, I could feel it" and other such ramblings that led me to say to Eli 'NO! I will not be the vicki-meat in her and her husband's love sandwich!!'
Last nite Tanya had just arrived and we got a drink and sat down and a lady came up and started talking to her. Because of the music I couldn't hear the conversation, but I assumed it was someone she knew. The lady started gently pulling at Tanya's elbow and Tanya appealed to us saying 'Noooo she's trying to set me up with some guy!' and we laughed thinking no more of it but I started listening this time...
Lady: just say hello! Just hello!
Tanya: no really, I've just got here. Maybe later...
Lady: come on (still pulling elbow)
Me: oh leave her alone, she's fine here (immediately regretting being cheeky with one of Tanya's friends)
Tanya: no, no, later
Lady: ok
(Lady wanders off)
Me: Who was that?
Tanya: I dont know!
Me: what, she just randomly started talking to you??
Tanya: she wanted to set me up with her son...
Me: Yeah ok that's scary.
Then a little while later she reappeared across from us and started motioning towards a guy at the bar. Tanya at this stage was sitting with us on the couch. Despite some remonstrating from her that she still wasn't interested, the lady made her way round the tables and came over and ended up standing in front of me, talking to Tanya sitting beside me. By this point I was no longer worried about being embarassing since Tanya didn't know this woman, and I put my arm around her.
Lady: come on, come over...
Tanya: no really
Me: will you go away? you're kinda scary...
Lady: (foccussed on Tanya not noticing me at all) come on
(Me and Tanya talking at once)
Lady: (noticing me talking to her and taking my elbow this time) you
Me: what? You want me to meet a guy?
Lady: yeah!
Me: Hmm I don't really like guys...
(Lady physically recoils and releases my arm, looking around a bit lost. The others laugh.)
Me: (laughing also) Gee, careful I may cough on you and then you'll catch it!!
Lady: (trying to brush it off, laughing awkwardly) Not one of those are ya?
Me: Yes. Yes I am actually.
(Lady stares. Others cacking it.)
Me: I'm serious.
Eli and someone else: She is.
(I put my arm around Tanya's shoulders again. Lady leaves silently)
That's the most hilarious response I've ever gotten.
10:46 am | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Monday 8 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Comfort is...
12:35 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Wednesday 3 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Juste Un Peu De Silence ("Just time to hear a little silence")
-Calogero
Tout ce vacarme
Tache de larmes
Jusqu'au bout desarme
Tout n'est pas dit,
A peine decrit,
Tires de l'oubli
Le temps de dire,
Le temps de taire,
Le temps de faire
Juste reconnaissance,
Le temps d'entendre
Juste un peu de silence.
Rien d'important
Que l'essentiel,
Une mesure absente.
Un rien laisse
A la portee
D'une vie impuissante
Le temps d'ecrire
Le temps d'entendre
Le temps de faire
Juste reconnaissance
Le temps d'entendre
Juste un peu de silence.
le visage plonge a terre
Clore un instant ses paupieres
Pour chercher ce qui nous eclaire
Pendant ce temps
Le temps s'enterre
Le temps de faire
Juste reconnaissance
Le temps d'entendre
Juste un peu de silence.
11:18 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Tuesday 2 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
'007 licensed to...
It was about this time last year that I was standing on the pier at Downtown Disney listening to Phil Collins' tracks from Brother Bear issuing forth from the speakers all over the Marketplace and The West Side.
I was on the other side of the world, travelling, seeing people I love again, getting closure, letting people and problems go. It was a good place to be in, I felt at ease and content.
Tell everybody I'm on my way
And I'm lovin' every step I take
With the sun beatin' down, yes I'm on my way
And I can't keep this smile off my face.
It set the tone for the rest of the year.
In 2006 I saw more of the United States and Australia, wrote many songs, began performing at the Acoustic Jams in Willunga, shaved my head for Leukaemia, got an awesome job that suited me to a tee, worked for and with some great people, bought a new car; I felt happier than I have in so long.
'007 has big shoes to fill. Already my slate has been wiped clean yet again with my job being dissolved, so again I've a shiny silver platter of opportunity in front of me.
I'm a little scared, but for the most part I know that the cosmos has something good in store for me and if not, whatever bad happens will help make me a better person.
So roll on new year, I'm ready for you. Katie and I have declared 07 to be the year of great sex and engagements. Amen! I'll have one, she can have the other... okay, she can have both... I'll settle for the great sex bit.
Right now I'm listening to Jeff Buckley singing Bob Dylan.
I see my light come shining
From the west unto the east.
Any day now, any day now,
I shall be released.
4:09 pm | Post A Comment... >
Let's call today: 'Monday 1 January 2007'
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
The Plot Sickens
More on 2:37 director Murali Thalluri's downward credibility spiral.
I couldn't find the actual article link, but it's been posted in the IMDB forum here.
Murali is a nice guy, but I've heard many a non-flattering opinion on him and the way in which he works (see article). Admittedly I didn't work with him closely, so I try and remain objective. Still, my own opinion is that he sneaked himself into his fame with 2:37.
That said, the film industry is not a highly ethical one I think, and I say break in however you can. It mayn't be flattering, but Murali has gotten some good publicity from the controversy of both the film and his operation... and in that field any publicity is good publicity.
People will be drawn by curiousity, and as long as your work is out there, who cares how your audience was attracted?
And those, my friends, are my words of advice to anyone with any artform to offer.
10:59 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Queer As Who?
Ok, so seeing Gale Harold as a spunky special agent on network television isn't so bad (though it does seem odd to not have him disappear into the back room of Babylon every now and then), and seeing Peter Paige slightly less camp than Emmett in a once-off appearance in a Will & Grace repeat episode is okay too...
But why the hell is Hal Sparks on Celebrity Duets and hosting some other hideous reality TV show I saw an ad for on Foxtel?
That hurts my face.
10:46 pm | Post A Comment... >
pirategirl
wrote in the notebook:
Beware The Twist
 On Saturday Maz and I drove to Robe for the 2006 Rockfest and felt highly out of place amongst all the teeny bopper kids around us (though we concluded it could have been worse: we could have been the pair of nanna's we found sitting aside in their picnic chairs).
Curse The Living End going all commercial... I knew only 3.6 songs and even those were post the band's JJJ exposure.
And I used to know (and enjoy) all their songs... bring back the old school says granny ol' me. Back when they were still influence by 'The Stray Cats'... Their second EP For Your Own Good was constantly playing full volume in our house when our parents were out. I loved it... and considered a freak at school because until Prisoner of Society came out, and Second Solution was used in the closing credits of Idle Hands, they were an unknown and uncommercial band. Therefore uncool to the average Year 8 student.
We only went down for the night, crashing in my car which has newly been transformed into a shagvan now that my job-neccessary equipment has made way for a mattress and pillows.**
We spent most of the evening walking around scenic Robe and before long had taken many stills - and later during an in-van game of eyespy - constructed the storyline for a new shlock-horror film with the working title 'The Twist'... so yeah look out for that on the drawing board. Ha.
Something that disturbed me was the small albeit animated crowd that swarmed around The Living End. Other than making the security staff work hard trying to keep the barricades up, so many people were throwing cans and bottles on stage. I couldn't believe the lads didn't say anything, let alone keep playing. If it were my gig I'd have at least told them to stop it, especially it I was actaully hit like Chris Cheney was halfway thru one of his energetic solos.
Who throws stuff at a band they love?? I wouldn't even throw cans at a band I hated.
Maz suggested maybe the crowd put all their love into their cans and bottles and were merely delivering them... after some of the crap I'd seen and heard from the mentality of that crowd, it wouldn't have shocked me much.
A mix of country teeny bops and myspace whores... I either feared for my life or wanted to vomit, I'm not sure which.
If I hadn't gone with Maz - or Basil as originally planned - I'd have shot myself OR the innocent bystanders... hence my reluctance to go alone. 4 hours of driving each way is a long way to go to have to make your own fun, but hey, I enjoyed it.
**The shagvan also came in handy when Katie and I went for a quiet New Years' Eve atop O'Halloran Hill, amongst other locations, lazing on the quilt and cushions waiting for the fireworks to start and eating Chinese takeaway.
9:29 pm | Post A Comment... >
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