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the pirate girl
 
Juste un peu de silence.

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and the shades of grey in between

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This is just a blog for thoughts - songs that are speaking to me, pics from where I've been today, or projects on the drawing board.
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pirate folder
the pirate girl

coeval happenings
reading: Moab is my Washpot - Stephen Fry
listening to: Napalm & Silly Putty - George Carlin
travelling/staying in: SA, NSW & Vic - depending when you catch me


Let's call today: 'Wednesday 28 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 

Yay, a sale a vistaprint!... yep... looks good... ooh lots of free things... yep... some prices slashed... but wait,... what happened with the last item???

Was $270.49 now $437.49

*whistle*
quite a bargain.


Hope no one needs a presentation folder.


12:05 pm | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
yesterday was a strange and yucky day.

I went to bed feeling sick the day before, so even though it was my night off, I slept most of the day and gave myself a little sleep-in. I usually get up around 6pm, Lauren woke me around 9. I felt a little better and my head had cleared a bit.

Most of the night went okay, we watched movies and did stuff online and I did my usual mix of ebay/yuwie/msn. I made chocolate cake. Then around 4 or 5am Lauren decided that she wasn't going to go to bed, and she grabbed the quilt and settled on the couch with her laptop.

My usual bedtime of 8/9am went by, the chocolate cake had been and gone. I was still coughing and sniffling, and unable to sleep.

By mid-morning/ noon-ish I decided that even if I did sleep now I'd be screwed for work so I called them to get the night off, then called the local med centre at marion to ask if they needed my tangible medicare card or will the number/details do. They said no we need your card.

Pfft. My card was with my parents. When we ordered another one it went to their address and there it stayed, I hadn't needed it since.

Okay so I called my old med centre on beach road and asked them if perchance they would maybe possibly perhaps have an appointment free for today? If not, I decided, I'd just leave now and wait in the casualty section. But voila! The answer came down the phone line like the old man from vicar of dibley.... no, no, no, no, no,...yes.... 5pm, see you then.

So I decided that today I'm visiting the south. Lauren's scheduled to spend the day with her mum shopping, and I'd visit my folks at home.

Meanwhile dynamics between Lauren and I were getting weird throughout the morning. I was very awake and sick. She's sick too but is able to be treated with antibiotics, lucky girl. I knew already I'd just be sent back to bed, but because of work I'd need a medical certificate.

Anyway, dynamics. Being not very with it, and tired and sick. I was a little grumpy. Lauren was interpreting every sigh, shift in my chair, groan and general "this is crap!" gesture as something I was expressing to/about her or something she'd said or done.

After a while I got tired of answering "what's wrong?" with "I'M SICK!?!" and just settled for "Nothing." Later on in the day, it became "Leave me alone."

Around 1pm, I was wandering aimlessly around the flat before deciding that this was a waste of a day, and I was tired of the weird tension that was unnecessarily building up so I declared I was about to head off. Lauren seemed to sulk that I was leaving so early before my doctor's appointment, she didn't seem to understand that while I was out I could spend time with my family, and my cat whom I miss daily, and maybe get some errands done like the pile of ebay items that need sending.

I picked up my bag and asked if she needed a lift anywhere. She looked at me and asked "come with me?"
"where?"
"I'm going to the doctors?"

I'm know sure how I was supposed to know that. I shelved it as one of those things she expects me to have psychically picked up, and said okay lets go.

When we got to the marion med centre, where we'd only been 2 or so days previous, it was busy. I mean, there was a line just to the nurses desk. The ones where you tell them what's wrong and they decide what order you go in based on your condition. Basically it's a triage disguised as a reception, trying to make it look welcoming and more like a hotel than a doctors' office.

I sat down, frustrated that I was here again and probably going to sit here for a long time. If i wanted to sit in a waiting room for an hour, I'd have done it myself. And I couldn't just say okay I'll see these guys instead because my card was still with my folks.

Lauren sat with me instead of securing a place in the line, which frustrated me even more. The sooner she was seen, the sooner we would get out, and while she was sitting with me asking me for the millionth time what was wrong and why I was sitting there grumpily, anyone could join the line and put us further behind.

I voiced these to her, saying that I didn't really want to be there, especially since I hadnt known we were even coming, and she said we'll go.
Childishly stubborn by this point, I said that no, you've asked me to be here, I drove here, we're here, see your doctor.
As far as I know, armed with a course of medication, all she needed was a certificate too. This was getting to me too - having to wait for hours just for this when there was other things I'd planned to do.

Lauren kept calmly probing me to go if I was so against it, and eventually I let her lead me out.

In the carpark she kept trying to hug me and I kept trying to pull away. I just wanted to be by myself and driving south, possibly I'd be able to lay on my old bed and get a couple hours of sleep in.

Lauren asked I stay with her until her mum came to pick her up and I eventually agreed. We sat in my car and talked a little about how we were each feeling today. She mentioned we just hadn't spent much time together; I slept all day yesterday, now we're going to spend the rest of the day apart...

I flew into defence.

Whilst I appreciated her concern, I felt guilty for being sick. And I knew that I shouldn't feel guilty for being sick, because I couldn't really help that, and honestly, I didn't want to be freaking sick. And if she had recalled yesterday when she was leaving for TAFE, I was at the door crying and holding onto her not really wanting her to go because I felt so sick.

Eventually, I got home to my parents' place. Dad was home. Mum was not.

My dad informed me that the cat had killed a bird, and while he was trying to pick feathers up with a sweeper, I suggested that the broom would probably do a better job. His reply?

Well you can do that.

How chipper...

Fuck off. I just walked through the fucking door.

*sigh*

After helping him clean up feathers, and bringing in from the car what needed to go in, taking out to the car what needed to come back with me, I went for a walk down the road.

I stopped at the bottom of the hill and just stood.
The sky was a beautiful blue, the sun was warm, and I was alone finally save for the birds twittering, and the few pairs of eyes that no doubt peeked out from behind curtains wondering what this crazy girl was doing standing on their corner aimlessly kicking around and staring up at the sky, breathing deep.

Before long, I heard mum's car return and I walked back up the hill.

Once back in the house, Mum and I sat and chatted and I got cuddles that felt oh so good. I hadn't seen her properly before she went away to NSW a couple weeks back. We were talking about some heavy stuff when my phone kept ringing and being messaged. I had to put it on silent, and reply to Lauren in short texts in between conversation.

This led to more interpretation that I was angry at her and that she was being de-prioritized and that to please please please assure her we're okay.

I wanted to scream into the air. WE'RE OKAY BUT JUST GIVE ME FIVE MINUTES TO MYSELF. I'M SORRY YOUR DAY WITH YOUR MUM DIDN'T GO WELL, BUT MY DAY HASN'T EXACTLY GONE TO PLAN EITHER.

I received a letter from my bank saying there had been a breach and that it was recommended I cancel the credit card attached to my bank, and they'll re-issue me a new one. This would now render me without any use of the creditcard function or atm's for about a week, but as long as I could still do internet banking, through which my rent etc is paid, I said that would be fine.

Once I had some time I texted Lauren telling her yes we're okay, I was just discussing important stuff, and she told me she was coming down on the train, meet her at Noarlunga.

I groaned inside. I liked that she wants to be around me, but does it have to be 24/7? Mostly because: if we have tension like we had this morning, is it really worth it? Shouldn't we cool off and see each other when we both feel better?

Some time later saw us sitting at my doctor's office. I went in alone, got my medical certificate, got a list of things that may help with my usual sinus problems, and went to pay the bill. Medicare will pay me back, but I have to pay upfront first. Now. $45.

$10 short. My credit/debit card useless for a week due to my bank being breached, I went out to the car where Lauren had retreated to see if she had any spare. No she'd paid it all into my account for rent, even though I said to only give me some of it so she'd have money left for emergencies.

Frustration building again.

I called my mum - person living closest to the offices and the one I'd have to do the least explaining to.
She came, loaned me the extra money, and berated the lady at the desk for the way the system is - like its her fault. Too drained to do anything more than tell her to stop it, and thank the lady again for her patience while I organised the bill, I apologised for the trouble cause and herded mum out.

I met her later at the house, transferred the money online back into her account, plus some extra, picked up some fruit and vegies she'd gotten at the market, thanked her again, took my full bag of food, and left. My 24hrs-awake checkpoint growing closer, I had to get home before I was unable to drive.

I packed the food away before dragging my pillow and my bottle of water to bed, and collapsed fully clothed into sleep. Lauren did join me with her laptop for a while but was clearly irritated that I was sleeping instead of spending time with her. I still don't know if she realised I hadn't yet slept, I'll have to ask her when she wakes up.
When I, half-asleep, asked her if I could have the quilt that was still on the couch as night fell and I was getting cold. She made such a fuss and pointed out that I was already hogging both of the thin blankets left there.

I told her to forget it then if it was so much trouble, sighed, thanked her when I felt it being placed over me, and closed my eyes to escape the day that had been. Many sorry's had been said back and forth throughout the day, but they were simply blunt arrows that glanced off the armour of the other. And the apologetic kisses that began at the start of the day slowly thinned out as they weren't received nor returned.

Now, an hour and a half after I started this rather long post, the sun peeks over the trees across the road and into my window. I sip on my water, surrounded by tissues used not only from my cold, and hope today things are better.

When she comes out of the bedroom I'm going to make her breakfast, and hope today goes more smoothly.


I just wish we understood each other more.

/rant


6:08 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Tuesday 27 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
VOTE FOR JORDAN!
Jordan is in the finals to be featured as the january boy-next-door in the blaze calendar!
atm he's neck and neck with another guy so lets show some support and get him in front!
vote now!
I'm thinking of entering... hmm we'll see.


5:52 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Saturday 24 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
drinking clear apple juice under a clear night sky


3:06 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Tuesday 20 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
sometimes my crappy hearing makes me laugh
the following takes place with both Lauren and I back to back, each on her computer or laptop.

Me:
aha! that's amazing!
Lauren: what's amazing?
Me: I persuaded my stubborn computer to recognise my iPod finally!
Lauren: that's cool.
Me: hell yeah! and Basil showed me how to do it!
Lauren: awesome
Me: She is! She's a god! Basil is a god!
Lauren: a god called Medusa
(pause)
Me: what?
(another pause)
Me:.....a god caught in a juicer?


5:50 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Monday 19 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
International Photograph-Your-Day Day!

Being a nightshifter, my day photographed here spans from 12:30am Sunday morning to 3am Monday morning.

12:34am: visit my locker on a break to check my phone.
3:03am: Dave gives me the finger in Pitstop.
3:09am: ham cheese and tomato toasted sammiches!!
3:09am/3:15am/3:26am: Dave gives me the finger in Pitstop (several images left out - you get the picture).
3:45am: Dave gives me the finger crossing North Terrace.
3:50am: Jacq (his sister) gives him the finger in the carpark elevator.
3:51am: Dave and Jacq simultaneously throw... something... (paper?) at each other over Jacq's car - coincidentally parked beside mine :)
3:57am: Jacq's car zips away home.
3:59am: driving past all the people lining up outside work for a taxi.
4:00am-ish: Dave gives me the finger via sms.
4:09am: driving in the rain is pretty.
4:21am: washing my hands with DINOSAUR SOAP!
4:23 - 4:25am: (linked photos) baking my chicken and veg pie & eating a mandarin while i wait.
7:25am: killing time on the internet-meats - incl Facebook and Pieces of Flair.
8:00am: putting on my Mr. Strong hoodie with the hole in the sleeve before bed.
sometime mid-morning via cameraphone: sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
4:00pm-ish: Crazy ANGRY man yelling outside by the back fence wakes me up.
6:56pm: showered and getting ready for work.
7:00pm: putting on my socks - complete fluke getting the right day.
7:29pm: travelling down in the carpark elevator.
7:35pm - 7:46pm: (linked photos) changed into my uniform (smexy) & greeted by Dave in the usual manner.
2:55am: finish work early!! yeeeehaaaaw!
2:57am: strutting around in my short-shorts in the changeroom
3:01am: "neatly" place my uniform back in my locker to go back to Wardrobe next shift.
3:02am: back in my civilian clothes
3:05am: have a drink before I head home - take note of how many people obey the signs at work.
3:09am: it's raining outside and everything's shiny!
3:11am: bye bye work, see you later tonight.




4:34 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Sunday 18 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
International Photograph-Your-Day Day!
Today is International Photograph-Your-Day Day and I'm intending on doing just that. Though so far I've snapped mainly photos of what I've eaten, and of Dave giving me the finger at (and leaving work) this morning, I'm hoping to get the ball rolling a little nicer before I go to bed (a little after dawn - maybe 8am-ish), and when I get up again for work tonight.
Hope to see photos of your day up on monday! happy snapping.


5:12 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Friday 16 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
And this is why we love Sunny.

vicki the pirate girl: i am bored. Dance for me.
vicki the pirate girl: you're only as strong as the tables you dance on.
Ms. Jay: *dances*
vicki the pirate girl: clap clap clap
vicki the pirate girl: thankyou court jester
Ms. Jay: I'm NOT FINISHED!
Ms. Jay: *dances more*


7:19 am | Post A Comment... >



pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
One more rant and then i'll STFU.

Myspace Versus Yuwie Pt1
By Bulletbutter
published Jan 15, 2008

Myspace has been in the social network game for the past several years. When they started out the site did not have a lot of features. You didn't easily find Myspace layout web sites, there were no videos or music.

Today, Myspace has over 1million users. That is a huge number! The amount Myspace layout web sites that are out there is ridiculous. I would go as far to say that there are nearly as many Myspace layout pages as there are members of Myspace. Myspace eventually started adding a lot of features to their site including user uploaded videos, images, music and they even let their users start their own groups.

The bigger they got, the more of a target they became for the Internet marketing spam bots. You just simply can not have a myspace page and not get spammed by one of these. Not to mention, your account will most definitely get 'pished'. Pishing is the act of logging into a fake Myspace web site which gives the attacker your login information. Once they have it, they use your account to blast spam advertisements all over myspace.

But let's try to stay on topic here.

Myspace is still the biggest social networking site on the Internet. Despite it's many, many flaws it still holds the number one spot for the 'best' social network. However, that could change in the very near future!

Yuwie is giving Myspace a run for its money.

Yuwie has only been around for a few months. Yuwie, as of now, only has just over 400,000 members but they are growing at an exponential rate almost every day. Let's go over some of the differences and similarities of Myspace and Yuwie.

Myspace Features:
- Can upload custom videos
- Can upload pictures
- Can upload custom music
- Can create or edit unique profiles (no java scr i pt and a few restriction on other codes).
- Can create or join groups of people with similar interests
- Has a built in profile editor
- You get a blog
- Through other web sites you can add pictures, widgets and music players
- Can post bulletins to all of your friends
- Can send private messages
- Can post comments on anyones profile.
- Riddled with spammers

Myspace Versus Yuwie Pt2
published Jan 15, 2008
By Bulletbutter

Yuwie Features:
- Can create or edit unique profiles (no java scr i pt and a few restriction on other codes).
- Can create or join clubs of people with similar interests
- Has a built in profile editor
- You get a blog
- Through other web sites you can add pictures, widgets and music players
- Can post bulletins to all of your friends
- Can send private messages
- Can post comments on anyones profile.
- You earn money for getting page views
- You earn money for recruiting people
- Seems to be full of people wanting to cash in on the money making opportunity

Remember that Yuwie is still in its infancy stages. There are a lot of things planned for Yuwie that just haven't been added yet. After all, it is still in beta.

Judging by the list, which do you think is better?

Let's talk about the key feature in Yuwie that might drive people away from Myspace, making money. Yuwie pays its users $0.50 per 1000 page views. On top of that, users earn from their referrals page views as well for up to 10 levels. So the amount of money that can be made on Yuwie is simple astounding.

The navigation part to Yuwie and Myspace is very similar. They way you make changes and add things to both Myspace and Yuwie is also very similar. So, do you think the newfound social network that pays members to do what they do on Myspace will eventually mean the death of Myspace? Or will the Myspace community hold strong and continue to be the largest living and breathing community?


7:15 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Sunday 11 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
not now

I wont look you in the eye
Cos I dont want you to see
All the reasons why
A lot of folks dont understand me.
Dont want you to know
All the things I'd never show - anyone
Anyone.

Not now
Maybe another time but not now.
Dont have alot of time now - for anyone.
Anyone.

I'll always turn away
Cos I know I wont wanna hear
All the sweet things that you'd say
Cos I know I'm not worth your tears.
Dont want to hurt you
Just like I never wanted to do - to anyone
Anyone.

Not now
Maybe another time but not now.
Dont have alot of time now - for anyone.
Anyone.

posted by the pirate girl at 9:59:00 PM
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
And the friendship ends over something so small? I don't understand what just happened.

"Dont want to hurt you
Just like I never wanted to do - to anyone
Anyone."


Sigh. Fix my happy-face mask, and forward along we trudge...


1:27 am | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Tuesday 6 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
havent done one of these for a while
but then, i haven't even been there in a while.

The books listed below are "the top 106 books most often marked as 'unread' by LibraryThing’s users."

Bold the ones you've read, underline the ones you read for school, italicise the ones you started but didn't finish, asterix the ones you actually own but haven’t read.

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
Anna Karenina
Crime and Punishment
Catch-22
One Hundred Years of Solitude
Wuthering Heights
The Silmarillion
Life of Pi : a novel
The Name of the Rose
Don Quixote
Moby Dick
Ulysses
Madame Bovary
The Odyssey
Pride and Prejudice
Jane Eyre
The Tale of Two Cities
The Brothers Karamazov
Guns, Germs, and Steel: the fates of human societies
War and Peace
Vanity Fair
The Time Traveler’s Wife
The Iliad
Emma
The Blind Assassin
The Kite Runner
Mrs. Dalloway
Great Expectations
American Gods
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Atlas Shrugged
Reading Lolita in Tehran : a memoir in books
Memoirs of a Geisha
Middlesex
Quicksilver
Wicked : the life and times of the wicked witch of the West*
The Canterbury Tales
The Historian : a novel
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Love in the Time of Cholera
Brave New World
The Fountainhead
Foucault’s Pendulum
Middlemarch
Frankenstein*
The Count of Monte Cristo
Dracula*
A Clockwork Orange*
Anansi Boys
The Once and Future King
The Grapes of Wrath
The Poisonwood Bible : a novel
1984*
Angels & Demons
The Inferno
The Satanic Verses
Sense and Sensibility
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Mansfield Park
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest*
To the Lighthouse
Tess of the D’Urbervilles
Oliver Twist
Gulliver’s Travels*
Les Misérables
The Corrections
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Dune
The Prince
The Sound and the Fury
Angela’s Ashes : a memoir
The God of Small Things
A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present
Cryptonomicon
Neverwhere
A Confederacy of Dunces
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Dubliners
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
Beloved
Slaughterhouse-five
The Scarlet Letter
Eats, Shoots & Leaves
The Mists of Avalon
Oryx and Crake : a novel
Collapse : how societies choose to fail or succeed
Cloud Atlas
The Confusion
Lolita
Persuasion
Northanger Abbey
The Catcher in the Rye
On the Road
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Freakonomics : a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : an inquiry into values
The Aeneid
Watership Down
Gravity’s Rainbow
The Hobbit
In Cold Blood : a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences
White Teeth
Treasure Island*
David Copperfield
The Three Musketeers*


wow i'm really lame.


11:20 pm | Post A Comment... >


Let's call today: 'Sunday 4 May 2008'


pirategirl wrote in the notebook:
 
Don't get mad, get even.

Possibly one of the best ideas ever.

Sick of junk mail?
Try this.


2:58 am | Post A Comment... >

 
   
 
 

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