Let's call today: 'Wednesday, 21 June 2006'
wrote in the notebook:
kinda bad day
For some reason two other photographers have nothing to do before they take Annual Leave in a few days so HQ has sent them to hang around with me for most of the week.
One is okay, one is the one I started safari with and the one I don't gel with.
So in a quiet area, where over 2 days we've only had 7 sittings, there's been the 3 of us... me doing the occasional shoot and them bitching, and now and then throwing me constructive criticism.
Unfortunately now they both believe me to be unwilling to hear their critiques but it really wasn't that that was frustrating me so much, it was just having them around, the one I have a clash with in particular.
So I sat on it all and took it everything in and had to have a few breathers now and then, then on the way home when I was giving myself a talking-to and trying to justify my feelings - talking as I would to someone who'd been watching the interactions of the day and enquired about them - I just broke and cried and got out what I really wanted to say: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE.
So I'm a little hormonal too... that doesn't help.
So home I am, feeling more than a little drained and a bit like a used dishcloth.
I've decided, after overhearing each of them saying that they see themselves as lasting about a year in this job, that I am going to be around for a long long time... just out of pride and spite rather than ambition.
The only way I'm walking away from this is if I'm fired, and knowing how much HQ loves me right now... that won't be happenin for a while unless I do something really REALLY bad.
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